Well, verily, I sucketh at keeping a blog. Good thing I... don't really care that much.

Go now and watch R. Kelly's cinematic masterpiece, "Trapped in the Closet." It's lyrical simplicy ("Daaaaamn.") and absorbing plot invoke a mood reminiscent of--of--of. Piss it. It's so pathetic and creepy and awful that it's FANTASTIC. You cringe, and then remind yourself that it's R. Kelly, and then you don't feel bad about feeling bad about it.

Imagine if you sing your way through life, but not in a Broadway musical way. Like, "I woke up laaaaaate this morning/And jumped in the showeeeeeer!/ But it was cold!/So I had to wash my hair real faaaaaaast/and now my head looks like/it was attacked by a rabid duuuuuck." These are the stylings of R. Kelly. And this thing? It's five videos. Go watch now.

Right, here we go.

I... swore I'd never be a blogger. Ha. Well, I don't know jack about maintaining a blog, or what people will be interested in--and I only know what I'm interested in about half the time. But hey, no worries. It's only my opinion.

I also know eff-all about html, coding, what-have-you. So bear with me these first few posts. I'm entirely ignorant of doing anything besides following directions.

My reasons for starting one now aren't entirely clear, even to me. Hopefully I'll be good about regular updates, even if no one besides me reads them. I guess, like most bloggers and writers, I want to create snapshots of what's going on in my head.... how where and how I live makes me the unreasoning insane person I'm quite often thought to be.

My Nana used to say, "I got lost at the bakery" whenever she encountered some situation or explanation that required more detail than a GAO manual. I often feel lost at the bakery. I think a lot of people do. But the cool thing about being lost at a bakery is that there will always be coffee and cake while you sort things out. Mmmm... coffee.